You Say Cyrillic, I Say Cirrhotic...

Part 1
Out in the suburbs for a baby shower -- it turns out that there are even more Slavs there than in the city. The local market had a very long, very foreign beer aisle, and while we passed up the 2-liter plastic bottle of gibberish-name beer, I got a healthy selection of smaller, equally-gibberish-named products. This is the story of their consumption.

Subject A: Baltika Brewery, "Zhigulevskoye" (also available in the aforementioned 2-liter)

Whatever that label says, this beer was a surprise. At first, I was skeptical. It tasted a little funky.
But pretty soon my objections were soothed by the decent alcohol content and even though this was a syrupy, slightly sour beverage I have to say it was less objectionable than I thought it would be. Not only did "gibby" here not make the "beer I hate" list, it actually was a lot of fun to hang out with for a time.
Ah, the old "got your tongue" thing. Turns out, Russian beers are huge fans of "A Christmas Story." Total classic. Poor Flick.

Anyway, the fun only lasted a short while, then this brew got surly and quiet, eventually embarking on mass genocide against the other items in our fridge, not to mention my stomach, which was upset by the heaviness and weird, burnt-grain aftertaste. Dasvidanya, killer. Flush!

By the way, be sure to check out the Baltika beer website, which is next-to-useless and makes no sense -- click around and experience the wonder! of a bunch of Russian emo-mooks staring at you with dead eyes; the weird! pictures of the dead-eyed women in wet button-downs staring at you while holding a Baltika beer; the terror! of a computer-generated island aggressively advancing to punish you for looking at the website.

Bottom Line:
Taste: like barfing, but slowly
Annoyance factor: gradually building
Felt exotic/dangerous: briefly, but then felt like a shower, like after watching "Red Dawn" or listening to European techno
Repeat buy possibility: 1 out of 5
Would buy it in a 2-liter: only for tangential acquaintances
Memories created: felt like work