Nader Hader II

My God it's...it's all coming true! Remember when some smart guy said that, he hoped Ralph Nader would make another run for President because he would get so few votes that it would marginalize all the worst people in America, once and for all? (Republicans are bad, but Nader supporters should and do know better, so they get the title of "worst.")

Well, it's happened. Despite the fact that the actual Son of God--to hear some of his supporters tell it--is already running, in the mortal form of Barastafari Selassie Obama I And I, Ralph Nader has thrown his colostomy bag into the ring. Never mind that a 74-year-old man cannot climb to the top of the greasy pole; Nader is doing it for the kids, man. His candidacy is all about giving the young people a choice, to wit: a 74-year-old man. John McCain, I guess, is just some sort of black, female 72-year-old with nothing at all in common with Ralph Nader.

Ralph's got problems, though. The biggest one is that the constituencies he seeks to woo, the pissed-off youngsters, the over-privileged do-gooders, and the hopeless dreamers, are all firmly aligned with Barack Obama. And Obama ain't about to let Nader talk to them.

Maybe he's the real thing after all. Obama, I mean. Anyone who can bitch slap an old liberal like this:

"He thought that there was no difference between Al Gore and George Bush and, eight years later, I think people realize that Ralph did not know what he was talking about."

maybe can also cut the nuts off a few Republicans, beginning with that whippersnapper, John McCain (of course, Obama'd have to go to South Carolina, in a time machine, in 2000, find McCain's nuts, and then get Karl Rove to agree to have them surgically reattached to McCain's groin, and then cut them off again).

But it gives one hope, does it not?