Dick Vitale is, uh, a dick

He thinks Illinois will beat Virginia Tech because U of I allowed "about 57" points a game this season. Just so you know, Illinois scored "about"--no, shit, exactly 57 points per game in conference play all season. So...they give up 57 and score 57. Yeah, sounds like a real powerhouse. (Barf noise)

1. Va. Tech beat Carolina twice. Carolina won the ACC regular season and the ACC tournament. The ACC is the toughest conference, agreed by all, in the land. Carolina is the #1 seed in the East region. VT has credentials. Illinois beat---durrrrrrr...

ANYway, the so-called Fightin' Illini (not affiliated in any way with Indians or any other offensive image--except maybe the image of flathead midwesterners whose whole lives revolve around crappy college teams because they'll never make it off the prairie) "allow" "about 57" points per game because they play in the very, very shitty Big Ten Conference.

How is the Big Ten worse than, say, the ACC?

"Hi! Is this the Jaguar dealership?"

"Why yes, bloke, it is."

"How fast does the best Jaguar go?"

"Oh, maybe 300 kilometers...uh, I mean, 186 miles per hour."

"Wow."

And then, later:

"Hi! Is this the Ford dealership?"

"Um, you know it is. The sign says..."

"So, how fast can your best car go?"

"Man....damn! I guess, like, 100 miles-per-hour?"

The point is, the Big Ten is Ford and the ACC is some rad, scrote-tickling import car company.

Illinois might beat Virginia Tech (why does a technical school have a basketball team?), but I stand by this extremely superficial, meaningless comparison.