Nader Hader

Ralph Nader is thinking about running again? What news! In other topics, the sky is blue, donuts are plentiful, and "The Daily Show" stopped being essential viewing long before the writers' strike.

Please, Ralph, pretty, pretty please: run again. That's right. Go with it. Get your name on all the ballots, make some campaign ads, challenge the Democrats and Republicans (but mostly Democrats--let's just be frank about this, yeah?) to stand up for your principles, whatever they are at the moment, and do your goddamnedest to become president!

At this time, in this race, you will get so thoroughly abused by the public, and you will garner so few votes ($100 says the final total is under 1 million) that you will finally become as politically irrelevant as you deserve to be.

I dare you, Nader. I fucking dare you.