The Sexist Life of Signage

Did you ever notice that women almost never drive the car in a car commercial? The last time I recall seeing a female behind the wheel is in a Ford commercial (highly fantastic, by the way, by which I mean "based on a fantasy," NOT "awesome...gush!") in which she plows her small SUV through three feet of snow (I told you it was fantastic) in order to get herself and her husband away from her in-laws. Now, this is hardly empowering: her husband is a wimpy mama's boy, as evidenced by his comment that "my parents said we can stay another night," and the conflict here is clearly between the wife and her mother-in-law. In other words, this is a commercial about women and their probems with one another, featuring an ice-cold, ruthless woman who would rather risk death in an underpowered, poorly-built Ford than endure another day with her simpering husband and his evil mother.

But aside from that, there aren't many women driving cars on TV. This could be coincidence, but it is more likely a deep-seated cultural preference being brought out in our innocuous advertising. The most obnoxious display of this is the Volkswagen series of ads that feature guys telling their girlfriends to shut the fuck up so they can listen to the sound of the engine. Now, if I only got one chance to tell my lady friend to close her wailing hole, it wouldn't be so I could listen for the squeak every time my German hamster made a revolution on his running wheel.

Usually, though, the gender bias is more subtle and ads are geared towards being funny so that we, the viewers, won't notice the discrimination.

However, there are giveaways. Charlotte, NC (which as you know, is the key to understanding America) has two main roads that run parallel and tell the story. Female passivity and male agency are bourne out on the very road markers, the visible "signs" of the invisible phenomenon. The streets? Kings Drive and Queens Road. Kings = Men and they "drive;" Queens = women and they "road" or "ride."

Where are the cultural studies people? Are they afraid to tackle real issues? Could it be any clearer that this pervasive problem is growing seeing that the penis power structure of oppressive sweaty-balled overlords can be so daring as to declare its worldview upon road signs?!